Yes it's true that there are some nerds who decide to part with us in this epoque (French) of economic and social upheaval.
Some of these ungrateful nerds are working on key projects, such as making our last software release semi functional, or translating the documentation from Chinese, Hebrew or Hindi into English. So, no, we are not in a wow wow wow frame of mind when the nerd gives his (or her or its) notice.
I developed 5 questions to pose (ask) nerds the very moment they announce their intention.These questions have had a very positive impact on lowering this type of churn; as such-I have chosen to share these questions in line with my core value of leading the pack and self agrandisement.
1) Do you remember the day that we pulled you out of the ocean off the coast of Libya and/or off the shore of Greece, to recruit you? Does your culture have no dignity?
2) Do you remember that your passport is in our company safe?
3) Did your partner (generally a wife) declare the Schwarzgeld income she made in our kitchen?
4) Did I ever show you the photo that we took of you and Svetlana in the parking lot?
5) We gave you a loan to learn English and it appears that you took the loan yet still cannot communicate. Will you return the loan in one installment, or now?
Hilarious!
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