Taking the law into his own hands, Hugh White, "diversity and inclusion vice czar" of my HR fiefdom, issued an email to all our staff and management team on the occasion of Acute Diversity Day.
The original plan called for Acute Diversity Happy Hour, but right under my nose, Hugh turned it into a full day. Read his email before I continue:
Why assume that if someone pees standing up that he is a man? Why assume that wearing a kilt assumes that Scott MacGregor is a Scot? Why assume that just because someone happens to be Danish that they are happy. Why assume that targeted assassinations are more cost effective than war? Why claim that leprosy is dangerous and infectious? Why assume that if Juanita eats supper at 11pm, that she has indigestion? Today, on Acute Diversity Day, we challenge you to look at your basic assumptions.
Hugh White, 0/C Diversity
After I read this email (on my phone in the parking lot at 7 am), I had no time to formulate a plan A, let alone plan B. All my plans are intersectional.
I rushed into the management meeting only to hear Chief nerd Comrade Carl's comment to CEO Stan. "Gloria and his team have become the ridicule of our nerds who come from countries where girls and girls and men are men. Hugh White should be kicked out her ass".
CEO Stan defended me: "Comrade Carl, just because Gloria is Canadian, don't assume that it is a pacifist".
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