Keeping abreast of the at-home-worker during the so-called corona virus shutdown

 

Keeping abreast

I may have mentioned that all our nerds are working from home, whether in apartments, tents or low-end public housing.

In the “ancien” way of doing things, I would wander around, or slum around R&D cubicles to sense the environment, gossip and get the “drift” of things. Sadly, this face to face, in your face, HR is not presently applicable. I don’t want to catch this "so called virus" and pass it to my 144 year old Mum.

This having been said, I developed a easily deploy-able tool to access the pulse of the organization; this tool allows me to send CEO Stan a daily bulletin full of warm and cold, big and mid-size data, which he calls, “The National News, read by Gloria Ramsbottom”. 

Stan leaves out my last name, Lemieux, which he cannot pronounce nor spell.

The tool is a short multiple choice questionnaire, and in the spirit of pretending to be kind during this so called virus or epidemic, I shall share this agile questionnaire.

1     Since I’ve started working from home, I admire our management even more

A-Agree

B-Mais oui

C-Ja

 2   The person that I most respect in our senior management team, besides CEO Stan is

A-Cost-cutting Mister Herr Krebbs, the CFO

B) Comrade Carl Marks

C-The right honourable Dr Professor Gloria Ramsbottom

 3    The best to describe our company is

A-Humane and compassionate

B-Humane and compassionate

C-A and B

 4     If need be,

A-I agree to discretionary effort

 5     Miss Cynthia Axe, our chief downsizer is

   A-Cutting Edge

   B- A worthy lackey 

   C-Useful white trash

Gloria and Ms Axe