A limitation on Working Working Working from hom(e)

Following a round table (I love that democratic word), our great leader Stan has once again revised our working working working from hom(e) policy.

1) Stan reaffirms his support of work work work work life balance.
For heaven's sake, why do I need to keep saying this?

2) From 0700-2200, (7 am to 10 pm for the Yanks), there shall be no work from home. However, on the way to the office and on the way from the office, one must-can-must-should be on con calls. Going thru a tunnel is no excuse. Kindly reroute yourself as per HR work life balance policy.

3) Stan has caved into popular demands, and from 2200-0700, work from home is allowed, albeit not yet (fully) encouraged.

4) If, between 2200-0700, one is engaged in another activity, HR will provide a new voice menu to allow you to "align" your behaviour if a call "comes your way".
Press 1 if you are in the toilet (is this going to be censoured)
Press 2 if you are engaging in non virtual parenting.
Press 3 if you are engaged in brief sexual activity.

5) HR supports work life balance. HR supports family life. HR supports a warm home.
Moi, je suis Gloria Ramsbottom-Lemieux, a votre service.

6) Folks in our Sales division must work all the time, night and day, for heaven's sake, or we will all be on the street.