5 tips to get a very meaningful “seat” at the senior management table

I have a seat at the table.
Mais oui!

1) Use the term “business partner” twice daily. If you did not study business, use the term 4 times a day.

2) Deny that “business partner” means firing people by the dozen, kissing the boss’s rear end and becoming a sycophant .

3) Become a profit centre. You issue a weekly news letter? Sell it to your avid readers. You doing “outdoor training”? Charge the loosing team. And sell insurance against being fired by text.

4) Define your core business. Is it “firing people”? Is it writing mission statements? Is it entertainment? Once you define it, become lean and mean. Fire locals and hire chief foreign labour. Make sure they speak good English.

5) Learn to text quickly. 500 words an hour whilst driving is sufficient.