Wednesday, 12 March 2014

Get rid of 6 leadership buzzwords

Cut the crap, or get the rap.

After an iterative process with HR's major stakeholders, it was decided to eliminate buzzwords from our corporate vocabulary in a timely fashion.

Furthermore, there have been several "asks" about the meaning of several terms we use which are not buzzwords. 
For each term below, an owner has been designated to drive the provision of a definitive definition in an agreed upon time line.

1-Talent Management- term owned by R&D manager, a certain Comrade Carl Marks, who has less talent in his disheveled team than Supply Chain.

2-Wow-wow- term owned by Samuel Snake, the mediocre intern in talent management.

3-Big Data: no owner needed; we can all feign understand what it means, and back it up with emotion.

4-Work life balance: term owned by down-sizer Ms Cynthia Axe, who needs to eliminate 40 jobs a week for the next 2 months. She will sample folks for an answer, and then swing her dainty ax, in a timely fashion.

5-Global and sustainable: I own that. I already have my definition. Global means American and sustainable means built to last, which is not a buzzword.

6-Core values: I own that also. Something we hang in the elevator, daily.

7-Holacracy: Holy grail for secularists, nihilists  and vegetarians. Take off your shoes when you say holacracy, svp. (That's French)

Axe-I will drive work life balance.

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