Thursday, 20 February 2014

I have 30,000 unread texts on my Blackberry Priv

Non wow

Following the non non non wowish "roll out" of the ERP HR module, and the failure of my HR team to "rise to the occasion" and manage this "issue" on their own, I now have 30,000 unread texts on my Blackberry Priv. I will need 2 hours to answer all of them.

I will share a few of these texts, just to prove how stupid people can be. 

(My Dad, Pierre Elliot Ramsbottom, tried never to deal with change people for this very reason. Dad sold insurance. I used to ask him what he did for a living, and he said, "Glo baby, I have a license to steal".)

Look at these 5 stupid and distracting texts which catch my skilled and devious eye.

1) From Cynthia Axe (downsizing) to Comrade Carl Marks (R&D):-
Is Georges one person or two?

2) From Cynthia to me.
Do Scots speak American English or British English?

3) From Comrade Carl Mark to me.
Why are my people not getting paid, you incompetent twirp? Is this due to your failure with ERP, girl?

4) From Hugh White (Diversity) to me.
When I enter "Ukraine", entry is denied and I get a Russian flag. And when I enter Sweden, I get a map of the Gaza Strip.

5) From Comrade Carl Marks (R&D) to CEO Stan and Chairman Ed
That Canadian farm girl Gloria is way over her head with ERP HR. Now you see that she is an elevated secretary at best, who happens to know a few words in French, which is no big f---ing deal. Why not replace her with a pro?

Kol kelb biji yomo

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