Tuesday, 18 February 2014

Coughing at Work

Hugh White is a thorn in my white Canadian ass

The stress due to pressure of the banks, the non wow revenue projection along with the flu season has led to a bout of coughing in our organization.

In the last management meeting, CEO Stan texted me that Comrade Carl Marks' cough, Chairman Ed's cough and my clearing of my throat are "appalling". I understood the clue. (Stan is a visionary leader).

The white heterosexual whom I hired to run Diversity, Hugh White, was instructed to prepare a white paper on coughing as well as some concrete recommendations.

Hugh White read the book by Kaufman and Tousser "Coughing at Work". White also did some research about coughing in our firm. White asked for a meeting with me to discuss the findings, but I asked him to text me the his findings.

From reading White's detailed text of 300 words:
  •  I discovered that all our staff, straight and gay,  are equally impacted by the present coughing bug.
  • The French cough sounds intellectual, the British cough "properly", the Americans think they cough the right way while the Hebrews complain the most about coughing. The Australian cough sounds remote and the Japanese all cough together. 
I found Hugh White's report to be total cr-p. I was about to call White to a meeting when I heard that White had gone home, ill. 

I need to keep this post short because Chairman Ed just texted me that his son-in-law, Samuel Snake, is about to do an internship in HRIS; the young Mr Snake wants to work on our ERP HR implementation, which is going non non wow.
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