|HR plays Key Role|
Our CEO Stan rolled out our new strategic plan for Q 4 based on 3 major sustainable (and global) principles:
1-Strategic sales will be boosted to get market share, even if this entails a "semi wow" almost break-even +- , from which we can easily recuperate, based on the outstanding service we plan to develop.
2-Cost cutting to allow "breathing space" for that useless nitwit Comrade Carl Marks, Head of R&D, and his band of lazy thugs, to churn out something that works. HR second in command, a certain Cynthia Axe will support cost cutting via her Early Bird Retirement Plan, as will Sarah Barracuda-Minnow, Head of Procurement, and one of Gloria's clerks.
3-Massive use of IMT-"Intrinsic Motivation Tools", to be developed by HR SVP Gloria Ramsbottom, who has delegated this global, sustainable, moronic and grisly task to a certain Jennifer Papadopolis-Otelini, Gloria's junior file clerk and former HRBP to Carl Marks.