Tuesday, 17 September 2013

Jennifer Papadopolis-Otelini

Feet to be washed

The aforementioned clerk  served as R&D HR "Business Partner" for a certain Comrade Carl Marks, our mediocre and nattering R&D manager. She is relieved of this role, as of now and joins our HR team reporting to me and me alone.

Ms Papadopolis will now have the following role:

  • Support Gloria by providing highly refined  intelligence and due dilligence  on what is going on in R&D.
  • Support Gloria by "adapting" Carl's compensation to the departure of Comrade Tim Buck, our disgraced Chairman, and Carl's former patron.
  • Support Gloria by washing Gloria's feet daily.
  • Support Gloria by calling her Ma'am.
  • Support Gloria by enforcing English only in our global dining hall.

I explained to Jennifer that Papadopolis-Otelini is
too long a family name, too foreign, not sustainable and not global. "I'll revert to you in a week, Ma'am", she replied. "I need to consult a change manager".

סוף טוב-הכל טוב

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