Thursday, 19 September 2013

Влад переезжает в штаб-квартиру компании в США в течение одного года
Gloria welcomes expats

Our beloved company, Immature Products, will relocate a Russian engineer from the Ukraine to our global North American headquarters for the period of one year. My understanding is that the Ukraine is in Russia, almost.

The relocated Russian's name is Igor, or Vlad; I cannot seem to remember.

Ms Axe (Cynthia) who heads out Early Bird Retirement plan, offered the following package, which Vlad or Igor turned down. Here is the essense of our rejected proposal.

1) Immature Products respects the rights of employees to live whereever they wish.

3) We welcome Igor or Vlad with open arms.

4) We will provide a web page with "accent tutors".

5) Igor will have 3 days at Days Inn upon landing at company expense. This will include breakfast for his wife and 8 children.

6) I ask the US federal government and State Officials to be helpful.

7) Payment in rubles.

8) We will provide an American flag for Vlad to hang on his balcony.

9) Vlad's wife will get to go to Saudia Arabia on our annual "Global Women's Week Getaway".  The price of the week getaways may be partially subsidized, depending on market conditions.

10)  The very day Vlad solves the problems for which he is brought to HQ to solve, I will accompany him personally to the airport to go home, as an act of appreciation.

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