Sunday, 8 September 2013

An updated list of characters in this blog

Gloria Ramsbottom-Lemieux; EVP HR of Immature Products; born in Moose Jaw; her father was Pierre Elliot Ramsbottom; the name Lemieux was taken on by her to be more "global". Gloria is single. Gloria has a Blackberry Q 10. 
Gloria is now banned from entering  R&D, but still manages the entire HR team.

Cynthia Axe, often referred to as "a certain Cynthia Axe"; Head of the Early Bird Retirement Plan, American, White, and unilingual.

Axe fires 34 people a week as Immature Products "aligns itself" with success, weekly. Axe has relieved 4000 people of employment in her stellar career.
Axe had a short affair with Stan, the CEO. 

Axe has had several life time partners, the last of which was K Ray Beauregard-Goldstein. See below.
In her spare time, she reads text messages and comic books.

Carl Marks, Carl is the present Head of R&D and Chief Cultural Czar of Immature Products. He speaks some Russian and understands some Chinese. He is related to one of the main investors, Tim Buck. Probably, even the Canadians who read this blog may not remember who Tim Buck was.
Carl was born in Spokane; no one knows where he studied Engineering. He spent time in Saudia Arabia, building a data base which documented opression of Saudi women. Obviously, Carl is not a Hebrew.


Jennifer Papadopolis-Otelini:  Carl's HR business partner. She is from Georgia, USA, white, and multi-lingual but it is never quite sure what languages she speaks besides English. Like Gloria, she texts constantly. She also disses Gloria, constantly. Jennifer is neither Italian nor Greek, but no one knows this, yet. Readers of this blog are advised that it may be worthwhile to purchase life insurance on Jenny's career.

Stan; CEO of Immature Products. Stan's family name is unknown. Stan is white, loves lasagna and is scared shit of his wifey, Wifey.

K Ray Beauregard-Goldstein; Stan's cost-effective chef. He has mixed ethnicity. His Jewish mom was born in Quebec City and his French father was born in NYC! Ha! K Ray was, as of late, a life partner of a certain Cynthia Axe until they split because K Ray feared getting axed one day. Stan loves K Ray's cost effective lasagna.

Wifey; Stan's powerful, brainy, magazine reading wife. The managerial articles she reads inspires Stan to give marching orders to Gloria. Wifey and Jennifer have yet to clash.

Sybil Civil; Wifey's sister who pushed Gloria out of a job but when it came time to fire people;  she turned out to be a socialist and she refused to fire people. Thus, Sybil's career ended at Mt Nebo. At one time, she was in charge of a drama free environment.

Winston Wu;  Senior VP of IT and Big Data. Wu was formerly HR-IT Lead and served as Gloria's representative to Diversity Team. Born in Canada, Wu's grandfather was born (perhaps) in Hong Kong on the Kowloon side in Sha Tin or Kowloon Tong. Wu speaks English only.

Winston has a stormy relationship with Gloria; he was a peer of Gloria's and  then "reported into her". Now he is above Gloria, probably parallel to Carl.
Winston makes more money than Gloria and Wu. 
Winston realizes that Stan has a sexual fetish with Big Data and plays that card well.


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