![]() |
A votre service
One of the nerds in on our big data algorithm team is a Spanish lady named Maria Paula Juanita Gomez Rodriquez Goldberg Teixeira de la Plata.
This morning, Maria stood behind me in the line at the coffee machine. In a moment of bravery Maria asked me "Dona Gloria, ¿lo que pasa if we die at work? Back in old Spain, the government takes care of this for the dead and his or her family. After all, we are part of Europe now".
I have no idea what Europe has to do with this, although I do know that in parts of Europe like Denmark, the government pays for everything.
In line with my core value of functional transparency, I explained to Maria that our HR policy stipulates that a nerd who has remained at work for 3 straight weeks and has refrained from washing as well as eating, who has no next of kin waiting to be deported from the USA, is entitled to a free cremation, along with a mainstream religious service conducted by Skype, mainstream being Catholic, Protestant or Jewish. (We used to have a 4th religion until the recent elections).
I forgot to tell Maria that the policy is only applicable for people who die on People Day.
Maria told me she was delighted to know, then she asked me if HR plans to introduce a siesta from 1300 till 1700 into the work schedule.
Luckily, before I had time to get angry, I got a text from my dating service and Maria was spared my wrath. |
I am the First Lady of HR with a stellar career. "People" is my middle name, on Tuesdays.
Thursday, 2 February 2017
On the job dying
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
How to dissolve your DEI team without throwing away the baby with the bathwater, if you get my drift
Bathwater In line with being aligned with major and minor trends in the HR profession, I have deci...

Glo at her best
-
Nose to the ground If l keep my ears to the ground, I notice there are plenty of external factors I need to take into account in ...
-
Om hundred 'aar er alting glemt Had it not been for the fact that I do not speak Danish, I would have been invited to be the ke...
-
Health care is a cornerstone of our recruitment strategy. Every illegal nerd that disembarks the boat knows that we provide health care...
-
It's done; my HR department has been digitalized, leveraging on AI, bigdata, small data, windows 11 as well as fully in line with my c...
-
Comrade Karl Marx, our VP of Software Development and User Experience Czar asked me in a Whatsapp message 'when is Martin Luther King Da...
-
Hiring young nerds is fraught with problems. For those of my readers who don't speak English well, fraught describes a situation that ...
I would check out Dead Peasants' Insurance (http://www.snopes.com/politics/business/deadpeasant.asp), maybe this particular tax loophole is making a comeback
ReplyDelete