The Jewish New Year, the Chinese New Year, and the Real New Year
"Many of our nerds and you Chef Ray have tribal backgrounds, and your own holidays, which makes it very hard to plan a corporate calendar. From an HR perspective, one size should fit all". This is what I was telling K Ray as we boarded the executive elevator together.
K Ray Beauregard-Goldstein is CEO Stan's private chef. As readers of this blog know, K Ray has mixed Catholic and Jewish ethnicity and he cooks cost effective lasagna for Stan, daily.
K Ray told me that it's the Jewish New Year next week. "Happy New Year, Gloria; you do not need to Jewish to enjoy our New Years", he said. (K Ray wears also wears a cross, to display his mixed ethnicity.)
K Ray shared with me that he embraces all the holidays of both religions to "cash in on having such a fucked up background. I take a digital detox course during all religious holidays!"
When I reached my posh office, standing at the door was a certain Hugh White, the heterosexual White boy who heads Diversity. Hugh also told me that the Jewish New Year is "almost upon us; it's on Monday, Gloria".
Hugh told me that the Jewish new year is a "diversity" issue, much like the Chinese new year, but the Jewish New Year is shorter. "And they don't give each year the name of an animal, unlike the Chinese", said Hugh. "Who doesn't?", I asked. Hugh look at me in dismay. (not next May)
I told Hugh that back in Moose Jaw Canada, I had a school classmate named Sharon Bernstein. Sharon had most of September off because of tribal holidays! Once Sharon told me that "September is a great time to be Jewish, why don't you convert, just for one month, Gloria".
I spoke to my Dad Pierre Elliot about that idea and he told me "I do not want to hear one more word from you about religion, be it yours or anyone else's, mon choux. Religion is superstition."
From an HR perspective, all these tribal holidays are an issue-between the Jewish New Year and the Chinese New Year and the real New Year (Jan 1), there is not much time to work.
And I remember something else. Sharon told me that the Jewish new years is not all a happy time. "Our holidays entail a lot of suffering", Sharon told me. That may be why she converted after her 4th marriage. Anyway, Sharon became an IT guru in medium size data, and I lost contact with her.
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