Thursday, 5 June 2014

Cynthia Axe named Big Data Baby

Getting Axe to put skin into the game as Big Data Baby


To: Cynthia Axe, HR Early Bird Retirement
From: CEO Stan
CC: Gloria Ramsbottom, EVP HR
CC: Comrade Carl Marks, SVP, R&D

Cynthia,

I told Comrade Carl Marks that I wish we had as much big data as we have software bugs.

But alas, we have 30,007 software bugs and a chronic lag of big data, especially in HR, Finance/Revenue Forecasting.

Let's move on this; I need you to put more skin in the game to bridge the gap.

As of today, you, my dear, are HR focal point for Big Data. Please leave the medium size data and small data to your boss, Ms Gloria Ramsbottom-Lemieux.

I do hope that Gloria will focus her skills on convincing Comrade Carl Marks to stop learning Ukrainian, start fixing product bugs, and stop hallucinating that he is Russian.

Stan

Big Data Baby




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