Monday, 26 May 2014

HR - RH adapt agile process for new smartphone allocation

Ramsbottom and Ms Axe


Ms Cynthia Axe (Head of semi-voluntary Early Bird Retirement) asked CEO Stan for a new Blackberry Passport. Stan, always the man, fell into the trap, as he told Axe: "I have no problem with that, Baby-just have Gloria sign off on it to ensure we follow procedure". 

(Our bigoted CEO Stan had called BlackBerry "Canadian crap".)  My Dad (Pierre Elliot) would have said that Ms Axe dressed like a slut the day she asked for the Passport.

Cynthia Axe sent me a text updating me. I sent
Cynthia's text to Purchasing and asked them to "sign off" as long as this is according to procedure. Procurement texted the request to Supply Chain, and Supply Chain forward the request to Hugh White, from Diversity. 

Supply Chain wanted to know if Ms Axe was a member of a persecuted "minority" group. The white heterosexual who runs Diversity, Hugh White, texted me back the purchase request, and I "forwarded" it back to Stan.  (All in all 76 texts were sent on this mission critical issue.)

Today, I saw Ms Axe flashing her new Blackberry Passport. 

Stan and a certain Ms Axe also had lunch at his mahogany table, and I will not go into details about how Ms Axe dressed. (Had I dressed that way at Moose Jaw High, my hide would have been tanned).

I will however note that Stan kept abreast of all Cynthia said...unlike most men Axe dates. I will also note that I snapped a picture of the two of them and sent to Wifey. This is big data.




2 comments:

  1. Could always send Axe in to negotiate an increase in funding for HR initiatives... this may be an opportunity!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mais oui, but that would compromise my integrity, as it were.

      Delete