Tuesday, 17 December 2013

Addressing the skill gap in the Sales Department

I am enriching Hugh's job

CEO Stan sent me a text at 500 am to convene an urgent meeting this morning. The meeting started at 0530 AM.

The participants were EVP HR Gloria Ramsbottom-Lemieux (c'est moi), Comrade Carl Marks, EVP R&D, and the nameless former Head of Sales, who gave notice last week after a 5 days stint.

Comrade Carl Marks ensured us that our new product will be almost nearly bug-free by August 2014. CEO Stan said that "until August", there is a "skill gap" between the present capabilities of the sales force and the challenges the sales force is facing, namely getting sales on this semi-stable product.

Comrade Carl gazed at Stan and said, "Skill gap back-filling is an HR issue, Boss. Do I need to be here?" Stan immediately released Comrade Carl from the meeting. Carl hurried off to his Ukrainian language lessons, so he can understand the 50 cost effective engineers we hired there last week.

Stan then said to me, "Glo, this is an HR matter-fix the skill gap for me, by the end of this week.

Hugh White, the white and heterosexual Head of Diversity, needs some job enrichment. I shall fully delegate this simple task to Hugh, although I will guide him to use Big Data as well as innocuous facts.

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