Monday 16 September 2013

How to carve out a more meaningful role for HR


 
Just so we all read off the same page....


1) Wifey read a magazine article about Confucian principles of unequal relationships and their impact on the art of management. Wifey is married to Stan, our hapless CEO.



2) Wifey asked R&D chief Comrade Carl Marks to discuss the article with her. Carl Marks  "referred" the article to a certain Jennifer Papadopolis-Otelini, his HR business partner.

Jenny is neither Greek or Italian. Jennifer put off answering Wifey, since Jennifer's to-do-list is chock-a-block with HR tasks....compliance, firing people, compliance, discipline, compliance,  hiring easy to manage performance coaches, and compliance.


3) Jennifer, it appears reads the wrong tea leaves. Jenny does, however, have a nice tatoo in a place I prefer not to discuss.


4) Here, our story continues:

Wifey asked Comrade Carl Marks to join her for lunch, accompanied by Jennifer Papadopolis-Otelini and yours truly, Gloria Ramsbottom.


Carl and Jennifer and Wifey and I has lunch at Chez Pauline. "Chez" is a French word often attached to French dining establishments.



Wifey asked me what I thought of the article. "Wifey, it is global, sustainable, actionable, and wow-wowish", I answered.



Wifey asked Comrade Carl what he thought about the article and he said: "it's a bit superficial, and as a Marxist, I find a lot of the ideas pretty repulsive, to be frank and earnest".



Little did Carl know that I have 2 brothers, Frank and Earnest.



Then Wifey asked Jennifer what she "read into the article". Jenny was texting (smsing) and did not hear Wifey. Wifey repeated: "Girl stop smsing....what did YOU read into the article". Jenny answered, "Ma'am, I have not read it yet; I am buried over my head of the process of performance evaluations".


Wifey and her husband Stan had a "one on one" (not sexual) and..... Jennifer Papadopolis-Otelini no longer reports to Comade Carl Marks; Jennifer will now work directly for me, starting immediately.
I will "carve out" a role for her.




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