Stan wants a corporate calendar
Stan, our great leader and CEO, has asked me to prepare a corporate calendar for 2015.
This task is very complex due to the lack of "globalization" of holidays. Specifically, the Chinese New Year is very late and the Jewish New Year is very early.
I love Chinese food so I leant how their calendar works from my waiter; Cynthia Axe used to have a Jewish life partner (for 2 weeks) and she explained to me how their calendar works as well.
I have also noticed that the Jews and Muslims even fast at different times. Can't they even agree about that?
How can I run a global corporate calendar with all these fragmentation and this divisiveness?
I have been working on this task for an hour and treading water. What a colossal waste of my time!
Hugh White, the white bizarre heterosexual who leads Diversity refused to deal with this task because when he was hired, Stan said: "Hugh, you deal with all irregular employees, with an emphasis on their sex lives, using the switch board as our showcase".
I am going to suggest that we all adopt the American corporate calendar and do things the right way.