Saturday 13 December 2014

What I have learnt about blockchain

On Tuesdays, people is my middle name

The only English speaking employee in R&D Engineering (besides Comrade Carl Marks) is old de Villiers who sleeps during round tables and long presentations.

De Villers is a soft spoken and comes from Africa, but not in that order. Our CEO Stan once asked me "How come de Villiers is as white as a lily?"  I referred him to Hugh White, from Diversity, who gave Stan a detailed answer. 

After Hugh's explanation, Stan texted me: "don't ever allow Hugh White to waste my time again, Gloria, or I'll fire your ass back to Canada."

It appears that Hugh did not make a good impression on Stan.

Anyway on Friday, the aforementioned Hugh White came into my office today, accompanied by old de Villiers. "Gloria I would ask that you listen to old de Villers", blurted Hugh.

As HR manager, I listen to people on Tuesdays, but de Villiers is a key contributor on matters relating to blockchain. So I stopped texting my sister and asked all to sit down.

De Villiers told me that "back where I was born, in South Africa, there is a crisis we can all learn from. (De Villers pronounced crisis as "cry-sis".) The electric company, which is run even worse that our company, started rationing power due to third world management techniques. Instead of replacing management and demanding accountability, they started a program call load-shedding, teaching people how to use less electricity."  (De Villiers pronounces less as "lis".)

Then de Villiers looked at me with parental tenderness and said, "Gloria, I have always been very fond of you. No one here likes HR very much. So I have a process improvement to suggest.  After all, I am an engineer. Why don't you rename HR as "Load-Shedding and Talent Management?"

This is one of the first times that an employee has approached me directly, although people is my middle name. I felt mild aggravation that my time was being wasted, as text messages began to accumulate.

However, I do have manners. So I asked de Villiers for his mobile number and BBM pin number, and promised to "revert" to him with an answer to his proposal.

Then I asked de Villiers for a tutorial on blockchain. De Villers agreed and Hugh White was allowed to go home early and attend to his wife, the very demanding Comrade Ludmilla White, nee Khrushchev.
Hugh White

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